Why try so hard. Thought for a while... Amazed I found reasons for myself. I'm not ready. For anything.
What I am looking for. Finding the even older me. The one I enjoyed being. Definitely not the current me.
The fat one. The idiotic one. The childish one. The one that is random. The one that dun care one's feeling. The one that must win and must not lose. The one that keep shooting words and swear at people. The one that could smile in Chinese class and get scolded for smiling.
As for now? Fuck my life man. It's way too down. I want and need someone to support me. One that care. And give a damn. Through not here yet.
But it'll not be you. Congratulation. Cause nightmare is over. Time for me to wake. <3